Friday, November 30, 2007

Whack and Sack

Oh how I hated having to attend the Well-Isn't-That-Special Meeting at City Hall on Wednesday. I wanted to be at the hospital where my mom was undergoing emergency surgery, but as Maxine pointed out to me: You don't always get what you want. In my case its more like: You never get what you want. (I should have been born a sex offender facility. They always get what they want.) What kind of daughter would be 60 miles away at a city council meeting rather than in the hospital waiting room during such a traumatic time? One whose mother strongly commanded in a tiny weak voice, "Go to that meeting! Save our farm!" What could I do? I've tried to explain to Mother that Milton's Mob condemned us to suffer the Sex Invaders and our former freedom is forever fucked. But my mother is an Optimist. She still thinks we can stop them because she still believes in the Power of Good triumphing over Evil. Under the circumstances, you have to admire her spunk.

Before the meeting, Onamia City Councilman Mark Loch surprised me by asking about my mom, sympathetically wishing her well. That act of kindness nearly bucked me off my high horse, except that he turned right around and made a motion to give NEXUS the sun, the moon, the stars; whatever it is they want today - and then voted "AYE" to fifteen years of tax abatement. So virtually, he voted to enable the company that's hellbent on taking away Mom's reason for living. (I wonder if he would do the same to his own mother.) I'm not over-dramatizing here. That is how we feel. We don't want the government forcing sex offenders upon us. It is horrible! We don't even want to live here anymore. We don't want to live with people who are capable of doing what they are doing to us. Our lives are ruined. But we can't pick up and leave either. Its taken thirty years to get the farm the way we want it. It cannot be replaced. We're too old to start over again. Besides, like NEXUS, we have no other place to go.

So, although I was almost moved by Mark Loch's concern for my mom (almost fooled), it seemed to me like somebody commenting "Oh look at that poor old dog" just before they run it over with their car. Let's face it - Mark has never ever even remotely tried to swerve... He's aimed his car at us poor old dogs each and every time.

After the council finished kneeling before NEXUS and performing service for Poopsie, negotiations began on the Corporation's purchase of the 38.81. They dickered a little about the $10,000 building permit and other little odds and ends. The question of water and sewer hookup was raised. Its a pricey proposition for anybody to hook up. And for the Largest Building Project in Onamia's History, there's a lot of money at stake. The City wanted NEXUS to pay for WAC & SAC. Poopsie wanted The City to pay for SAC & WAC. I'm pretty sure that they're talking about Water Availability Charge and Sewer Availability Charge ... (how much it costs to hook up to city water and sewer.) But which came first? The water or the sewer? Is it WAC & SAC? Or is it SAC & WAC? (If we could vote, I'd pick WAC & SAC. Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?)

Here is a perfect example of how Poopsie deceives - IN MY OPINION, MR. MANDERFELD. (You were there. You witnessed it. ) Poopsie indicated that there would be no further strain on the Onamia sewer system since they were only transferring shit from one location to another. (Yes, I'm exercising artistic license by PARAphrasing...) Shit from one location to another.

But here again, what Poopsie said is NOT TRUE. It might be, if Crosier were to close its toilet lids forever, but they aren't doing that. For all we know, Crosier could replace 94 juvenile sex offenders with 94 Catholic priests. There's no way of knowing what the future will bring. It could be double the shit. Also, at the new NIMBY location, Poopsie promised a whole lot of extra brand SPANKING new employees. More shit.

Can Onamia handle all of this shit?

The current sewer system may not be capable. And then you also have to consider the Ball Park housing development, as well as private homes being built next to Bill Hill's house. They're talking a bunch of shit.

It would be pretty funny if after everything we have done to try to stop the Space Invaders it screeched to a halt because of WAC & SAC. But this is no laughing matter... The city of Garrison had to place a moratorium on building because of its out-com-moded sewer system. Maybe Onamia will have to consider more than who pays for the $14 million dollar academy's WAC & SAC and consider who will pay to upgrade the entire sewer system for the entire town. (Oh oh oh! I know I know!!!! It will be We the Taxpayers! How much you wanna bet???)

So much for tax abatement... NEXUS scores again! Do you see why we need a PLANNING commission in Onamia? We need to PLAN. Because, let's face it folks, we can't handle much more of NEXUS and their shit.
WAC & SAC or SAC & WAC.... When it comes to Water And Sewer Hookup, its all a WASH.
I heard that Poopsie is spending January in Palm Springs...
Then he IS retiring from NEXUS?
Don't know. You can never get a straight story from those NEXUS people.
But he's spending a month in Palm Springs?
And then in March he's going to Italy.
Italy! How nice for him.... After ruining everything for Hannabelle, her family, and all the Neighbors, he pulls out his Golden Parachute and just sails happily off into the sunset...
Yeah, leaving them with his shit!
That's not very nice of him.
Yeah. What an asshole!
Shhhh. Careful. He'll sue you!
In my opinion, Poopsie is an asshole. Will that do ye?
That will do me just fine. Thankee sai. Although I might dare to argue that it is a fact...

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Through the Night

I can't sleep. My mom is going back under the knife tomorrow. Things haven't gone well for her and another surgery is necessary to correct some complications... Isn't that how they always put it? Complications from surgery... I'm worried sick. My mom is a sweetheart. The first thing she said to me after waking up from the Grand Filet (her last surgery) was, "Hi. How are you?" The last thing she said to me tonight was, "Take care of yourself." She isn't from the "Me Generation".


I've been trying to rest because tomorrow will be another very hard day and I'll need to be strong. But I keep thinking about my mom - and my anger towards the Hegemonists is a level ten on the old Loath-o-meter. (If that Pronexus goon who keeps threatening me were here right now, I'd invite him to "go ahead and make my day..." I'm in a mood!) And I keep thinking back to my first conversation with Poopsie when he used several tactics to try to manipulate me. I think I wrote about that previously. He used the "Friendly Approach", the "Fatherly Approach", the "Flattery Approach", etc. But he also said some pretty nasty things, including "There must be really BAD PEOPLE in your neighborhood!" .... Yeah right. Why? Because we fight against Space Invaders who don't abide by the rules as they force themselves down our deep throats? That makes us "BAD PEOPLE"? Well, I'm not overly fond of all of my neighbors, but I don't think there's a sex offender in the bunch and to my knowledge everyone PAYS THEIR TAXES, so I think that's a little Pot calling the Kettle black, don't you? In psychology 101, the term for this particular defense mechanism is "Projection". Look in the mirror. The fact is: WE DON'T WANT BAD PEOPLE IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD!!! That's why we certainly didn't invite you.

My mom and I disagree about the sex offenders. I actually think they need some sort of treatment - just not in my backyard. Not here! She thinks they should be punished for the harm they have caused their victims. They are convicted sex offenders, after all. She doesn't think they deserve a $14 million dollar facility. (She's sweet, but not one to coddle.) I'm starting to be swayed to her way of thinking. To tell you the truth (and I always do), I don't think NEXUS or its sex offenders deserve anything but a boot in the butt, a foot in the fanny, a kick out of the county.

It makes me so mad when the Pronexus try to pass off the PTBs as "normal" kids. Do you know what the difference is between a normal, curious (horny) adolescent experimenting with his up-and-coming sexuality and these sex offenders? The offender has caused harm to someone he has victimized. This is not a case of "you show me yours and I'll show you mine." The sex offender HURTS people! The offender usually realizes what he is doing is wrong. He forces himself on his victims for his own gratification without consideration for his victims' feelings. Rape isn't about sex, its about Power. He lacks empathy for his victims. He doesn't accept responsibility for his actions, or he justifies his crimes. He might even blame the victim. Or he might bribe and manipulate his victims. He may use the same tactics Poopsie tried to use on me during that famous first conversation... (Not that Poopsie tried to bribe me. No new truck here...) The offender gets off on being in Control. And very often, he threatens his victims with: "If you tell, I'll sue you!"

No wait. That's NEXUS that does that.

The sex offender often threatens: "If you tell, I'll KILL you!"

No wait. NEXUS does that too!

[WHOOP! WHOOP! LAW SUIT ALERT! LAW SUIT ALERT! I'm not saying NEXUS threatened to kill me. Let me clarify... Its the relatives of a NEXUS employee who have been threatening and harassing me. I just wanted to make that perfectly clear. Okay, Mr. Manderfeld?]
The question is, did NEXUS learn its abusive tactics and harmful strategies from the very convicted clients they purport to help? You have to admit that their methods carry a similar odor. For the past going on eight months, NEXUS has been brutally forcing itself on its Bradbury victims. There has been no empathy whatsoever for us. They are only interested in their own gratification. Its all about THEM. Its about Power and Control. And its all about Money... And what they are doing is worse than the crimes of their sex offenders because NEXUS' offenses are not only condoned but whole-heartedly supported by our government. Our innocent neighborhood has been kidnapped, held hostage and is being GANG RAPED by a bunch of bullies!!! And I can say from personal experience that if we tell we get sued and we get death-threats. Instead of getting STDs, we get PTSDs. But then, maybe I'm just "over-reacting", right Poopsie?

This is the company our government is keeping. It intends to keep it no matter what. Tomorrow the Onamia City Council will approve tax abatement for this Corporation which has a $38 million dollar annual budget and made over $4 million dollars in profits last year. The City of Onamia will complete the purchase of the property and start working on altering and destroying our city ordinances in order to make the rape of our neighborhood legal. (Currently it is not.) In essence, the government is holding us down to enable the corporate rape. They might make it legal, but it is not consensual. I assure you, it never will be. This institution's abuse will be continuous and ongoing. It will never end. No Social Services will save us. The calvary ain't coming. And this makes our situation all the more tragic. No one cares about us victims. You know what? If given the choice between what NEXUS has done to me or being anally raped with a broomhandle with country music playing in the background, there wouldn't be much of a contest. Broom. Sweep me up Scotty. I know the damage NEXUS can do. I've experienced their torture for eight months. It is destroying me. It had better not destroy my mom.
I can't blame my mom's health crisis on NEXUS, but I know that because of the situation we're in, it is greatly interfering with her recovery. She was happy with her life in Onamia before NEXUS started crowding her. She loved it here. Now everything is ruined. It can never be the same. We will never be the same. Poopsie was right. Soon, there MUST BE SOME BAD PEOPLE in our neighborhood. There WILL be. They're coming here and we can't stop them.
Yuck. I feel so violated. So dirty. I think I'll go take a shower now.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Fathers Knows Best

When our Founding Fathers formed this great country called the United States of America, they really knew what they were doing. Those guys were sharp. They understood human nature. They were planners. They wrote a Constitution and a Bill of Rights - complete with safeguards, checks and balances, and so cleverly devised and written that one would think it infallible. Yes, we tagged on a few amendments, some really good ones in fact, but the basic concepts of the Fathers haven't changed in over 200 years - well, until recently...

Whether you favor the Sex Offenders or are for the Neighbors, I'm stunned that there isn't a huge outcry against the city, county, and state governments as well as the NEXUS corporate administration. They have taken a firm, unwavering stance that the "Common Good of the Community" overrides the rights of the Individual. That's right... our government and NEXUS support COMMUNISM. And that is Anti-American. Its bullshit.
Yet, nobody's talking about that crucial point. They only want to talk about how mean we are to the PTBs (Poor Troubled Boys) and the MLA employees whose jobs are more important to the Government than people! A business is more important than our individual lives! If you'd stop and think about it, they don't care about the individual who has the job either. The presence of the Job is all they are concerned with, not the individual person who has it.

What I'm saying is: You Pronexus people think that the Government cares about you? Think again. The Government doesn't care about YOU. It cares only about your job. YOU can be replaced. As can we all... even the Government. Wait until the next election if you don't believe me now.

What has happened to us in our neighborhood will one day happen to you. Maybe they won't dump 94 sex offenders on your doorstep, but rest assured that by giving them this inch, they will eventually take your mile... in some shape or form. So if we lose to city hall, it isn't confined to Bradbury residents and surrounding property owners. Let's put it this way: If NEXUS wins, we ALL LOSE. The Government has overstepped its boundaries - both literally and figuratively. Instead of protecting its citizens, it has decided that All Men (and Women) Are NOT Created Equal after all. They have stripped us of our individual identities. We have been collectively labeled the "Bradbury Idiots" not because we're stupid, but because we are CHALLENGING them as we fight for our rights - rights bestowed upon us by the Founding Fathers who knew a bit more than the shortsighted unimaginative Onamia mayor and his brown-nosing Yes-men.
Is anyone FREE in Onamia? Nope. Some of us are exceptionally oppressed. Others may not be free, but may possibly be purchased - when the price is right.....

Our Founding Fathers foresaw problems with government because they understood that: Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. They planned ways to keep Bad Individuals from gaining too much Power as well as ways to stop the abuse or misuse of that Power. The three branches of our government kept a Balance of Power. A representative government of the People, by the People, and for the People with periodic elections kept Bad Individuals from taking over our country. But there's something else. Something really important which many of us tend to forget... Who is responsible for safeguarding our Democracy? Who is in charge of making Government tow the line? Why - We the People! That's who! And we'd better make darn sure that we do a good job of watch-dogging. Its important.

So anyone who wants to support the sex offenders at Mille Lacs Academy should be scrambling like mad to keep this out-of-control malignant local town mayor and city council from Doning this Deal in this way. Support your sex offenders, but don't forfeit your Constitutional rights to do so. For by forfeiting our rights, you are forfeiting your own. Folks - what has been done here is WRONG! It is Un-American. If you don't speak out against our fascist local government now, when they are changing the ordinances to allow a commercial institution into a residential neighborhood which opposes this travesty... if you don't stop them when they have a hundred sex offenders in their hands, how will you stop them when they decide to dump nuclear waste in your back yard? If we can't stop them now, you won't be able to stop them tomorrow - when its YOUR turn... And then it might be too late for you. Hannabelle? Hannabelle? We NEED you Hannabelle! I might not be able to hear you from my 80 acre wilderness retreat in Somewhere, Canada.

Think about it.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Talking To Turkeys

It's Thanksgiving! What are you thankful for?
New cars? New carpets? New liquor licenses? Money in your Swiss bank account? New paint jobs, snow jobs, blow jobs, your new teaching-to-go job? Sweet deals? Big meals? Land sales, annexation, tax abatement? The new school referendum? Higher taxes? So much time, so much money! Are you thankful just to be alive? Are you thankful for not getting caught yet? So much for you to be thankful for!

We might be surrounded by a lot of turkeys in Onamia, but THANKS to Nexus, the Onamia City Council, Steve and Loretta, and the Pronexus, nope - there's no Thanksgiving at Hannabelle's house this year. All we have to "celebrate" are sex offenders, Loss of Liberty and a whole lot of agony.

And to that we say "No Thanks".

Monday, November 19, 2007


Shut up and Deal...
Once again the deck was stacked with MLA jokers at City Hall last Wednesday as we sadly witnessed Lady Liberty take another brutal whipping. The Nexus City Council "Public Hearing" was a mere formality, as has become standard policy in Nexusville. Intending to provide what amounts to infinite tax abatement to his Lord and Master, the Nexusville mayor had already made up his mind long ago to toss people's hard-earned tax money into the ever deepening pockets of the corporation he serves. He had already made up the minds of the Nexusville City Council as well.

"We can vote you out!" shouted one outraged citizen. That's more than we can shout here in Bradbury Township. We don't have voting rights over the local government in charge of replacing our democracy with financial fascism, trading the public welfare for corporate welfare, sacrificing citizens - not for the good of the community, but for the good of their own wallets. The faces of the Nexusville City Council will change after the election in 2008. Of this there is no doubt. But once Nexus CGO Milton (Chief Government Official) erects the sex offender's facility, the irreparable damage will be a Done Deal There's Nothing You Can Do About It. If We The People allow them to do this to us, we are handing them a Permission Slip - It says: Here. Do what you will to us. We don't care.
I care.
Poopsie showed up at the Public I-Can't-Hear-You, pulling Aces out of his sleeves as usual. But he didn't fool We The People, at least most of us. Several times he was publicly called out for cheating. But that was to be expected... We The People are quite unbamboozleable by now. We're on to their tricks.

Para Deuces
There were two Nexus employees who spoke at the meeting. What really sickened me, was when one of them, a MLA teacher used her allotted five minutes to try to enlighten us as to the wonderfulness of Nexus, her employer, (which probably made quite a few points with Poopsie... if it do ya fine). While she spoke about not minding the daily commute from Brainerd to work with those poor troubled leaf-rakers, and blah blah blah, I looked around the room, studying the forlorn faces of my good neighbors.

As you know by now, I've lived here for almost thirty years - longer than the young MLA teacher has been alive. One neighbor has lived here for forty years. She is 82. They plan to put violent sex offenders right next door to her regardless of how frail and anxious she might be. Another neighbor has lived in Onamia since 1946 - over sixty years. He and his wife, another life-long Onamian raised their family in Onamia (long before it became Nexusville). Not only does their property abut the building site, so does their daughter's home. The Nexusville mayor disregards their opposition to having 94 sex offenders next door. I saw another neighbor who was born and raised here some five-plus decades ago... His Just-Say-No has been ignored. And yet another set of neighbors who have been here since long before I arrived. Their feelings are insignificant to the Nexus Regime. None of us matter. Period.
Between us we've accumulated hundreds of years in Onamia!
But we don't have an annual budget of $38 million between us...

This Nexus spokesperson, who was trying to make a case as to why her job was more important than our lives, our memories, our homes.... well, she started with Nexus this fall. She'd been enjoying her new job at the Academy for just over two months..... and she doesn't even live in Onamia. The President of the Teachers Union had never heard of her, which was.... weird.
The Nexus City Council in Nexusville seems to forget that we have lived and worked in this community most of, if not all of our lives. Long enough to retire here... We have all contributed to the community - paid our dues and paid our taxes... There is an old movie starring Anthony Quinn called "Nanook of the North." In it, the Eskimos put an old lady out on the ice, leaving her to die. Sound cruel? Onamia puts sex offenders next to our old ladies. Do they seek the same results?
What do you think? Why should this Brainerd girl's new job trump the rights of good local citizens who have spent their lives in Onamia?
Why aren't our seniors receiving seniority?

Could this be a crooked game using a stacked deck with each fixed hand being dealt by Poopsie? What is the name of the game? Minnesota Hold 'Em? Crazy Eights? Go Fish? Fortune 500? War? OLD MAID???
No matter the name of the game, we all know who will win the pot...

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Like Daughter, Like Mother

My mom is a lot tougher than she looks. She sailed through the surgery and is on the mend. Although she's still in intensive care, she is expected to move to a regular room soon and will come home next week sometime - if everything continues to go well.

Thank you to everyone who expressed concern through comments, emails, e-cards, and phone calls. Who knows - Maybe Nexus saved my mom's life... Nexus has turned us all into fighters. Before her operation she said that she needed to survive this surgery because she wanted "to live to see NEXUS go away!"

So her new name is "Strongheart the Warrior Queen". We are so relieved that she is still with us. Of course, it would be a mistake to underestimate this itty bitty little old lady. She's my mom. :)

Thank you again!

Thursday, November 15, 2007

When it Rains

Dear Readers,

I feel lucky that I got so sick last month and ended up in the hospital. Why? Because that was then and this is now - and although I'm not yet up to 100% of my 58%, I am recovered sufficiently to take care of the business - Family Business which has suddenly befallen us. Things would be unbearable if I had my crisis now - because now it is my mom's turn...

I'm posting this here because I'm not sure what will happen over the next few days and if I disappear, you might think that either the NEXUS lawyers or Larry's goons got me. I'd actually prefer that to this... Mom is having triple arterial bypass surgery tomorrow morning, and at her age (84) and in her condition (frail), it is pretty terrifying. I know its going to be rough on Poncho and me.... I can't even begin to imagine how rough it will be for my poor mom! Its not an easy surgery. While she faces this so bravely, my courage has gone AWOL.

For all of you Hannabelle Fans (the Oregonians, Team Hannabelle and all), please think good thoughts for my mom. For all of you Hannabelle Haters (MLA supporters, the anonymice and all), please think good thoughts for my mom. If the spirit moves - and ya feel like praying something nice for her, I guess it wouldn't hurt... During this unexpected and unwanted sabbatical, who knows, I might write up a storm during the next few days - or I might not. But I will try to keep you posted here. Wish us luck!


P.S. Keep the comments coming. I'll do my best to keep up.

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Deja Vous All Over Again

How well I remember that cold, cloudy day six and a half months ago - April 18, 2007. I was out by the pond, looking at the stream outlet, which flowed heavily with the spring thaw. I was in the process of choosing a few more rocks for the beautiful little waterfall when I saw Poncho approaching from the house, his face grim. He shared bad news that NEXUS was coming our way. The academy would be built down our street. I listened to his horrifying report. "Its all over", was my reaction. Its all over.

This is not the first time I've gone through this. I grew up on 5 acres abutting the building site of Armstrong High School in Plymouth, Minnesota. They built the school and parking lot along the back fence, reaching beyond the length of our property. We lost our view of the woods, with Medicine Lake in the distance. Not one of the magnificent old oak trees was left standing. The new school left a huge footprint on the landscape, and an even bigger one on me.

I fought them then, as best I could. But what can an angry, broken-hearted fourteen year old girl do to stop "Progress"? About as much as an angry, broken-hearted fifty-three year old woman, I guess. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Back in 1968, I tried going through the system, but then as now, you can't stop Goliath if you don't have at least 38 million dollars of stones for your sling. At fourteen, I didn't have enough stones to build a small beautiful waterfall. Fearlessly, I stood in front of bulldozers daring them to run me over. You probably know how effective THAT was... Like now, there was no way to stop the destruction. At fourteen, I learned a lot about people and power. I learned that I didn't care much for people in general, and I certainly had no power at all. That hasn't changed much either.

Back then, I watched helplessly as backhoes and bulldozers clear-cut the woods I'd loved; where I'd spent so much of my childhood riding ponies and horses, playing with my friends, studying nature and learning about wildlife. Soon I will watch the similar demise of the Grosslein/Bye woods as they clear-cut and destroy that beautiful chunk of heaven. I watched-will watch the land be flattened into a desert of brown mud. I heard-will hear the noise. I smelled-will smell the dust and fumes and smoke of the burning trees. I cried-will cry the tears. Tears of my youth spilling down my much older face. "Its all over." My heart broke-will break once again.

New roads will be built or widened and paved to accommodate the huge increase in traffic. Stop lights, turn lanes and speed limits will be added. Changes will all happen faster than you can imagine. Someone will manage to buy and annex land west of town to build a gas station and convenience store to cater to MLA employees who commute from Little Falls and Pierz. (You know, all those MLA employees who spend thousands upon thousands of dollars on gas and groceries in Onamia...) To escape, as D'Angelo described as "the traffic, the noise, and the boys", long time locals will probably try to sell their land. In this case, however, who will buy it? Some people may like living close to their kid's school, but nobody wants to live next to sex offenders (except in Onamia, of course). So forget about this remaining residential in the future with the academy here. But perhaps it will work out for Mike and Larry and Bill to build double-wides and trailer houses and more low-income housing after all, along with their industrial park and possibly a commercial district as well.

With my own eyes, I have seen such rapid changes. In Plymouth, however, they built pretty expensive homes and condos instead of what Onamia will build. Onamia is a Title IV place with Title IV dreams. We're not exactly "high acheivers" here. I strongly recommend that everyone in Onamia, especially those who support building the academy west of the Rum, take a "field-trip" to Armstrong High School to see for yourselves. (Of course there are no actual fields left there anymore.) Take 169 all the way to 36th Avenue North. Turn right. Go 1/2 mile. You'll see it on your left. Come home and take a look at the Grossein/Bye property. Imagine it. If you'd rather have Plymouth, either move there or wait four years. You won't recognize this place. A few of us moved here to escape the cities, the suburbs, the traffic, the noise, the too-many people. We love nature and cherish our privacy. We are being denied the choice to sustain our neighborhood the way we prefer. Our rights are clearly being violated by those who do not share our vision. However, it is not THEIR right to ruin things for us. As bad as it was in Plymouth, at least they didn't cheat.

Up until now, the destruction of my childhood neighborhood was one of the major life-altering experiences of my life. And adding insult to that injury, I had to cut through my own pasture to attend the hateful school; that building which shattered my youthful idealism and shaped who I am today. Proponents of that "Progress" which forever ruined THAT rural residential neighborhood, embedded an angry rebelliousness within my heart which has never since seen enough human kindness to counteract the effects; an act so devastating to young Hannabelle, its damage cut a wound in my heart which is probably too deep to ever heal. The wound is wide open now. And of course, I gush freely...

Back then, there were no personal computers and not even Al Gore had thought about the Internet. No one to talk my troubles to. No NEXUS lawyers getting paid to read my blog. So what did young Hannabelle do then? Retreat from society as much as possible. I struggled. It has been a struggle ever since. At age 17 I took off to look for America. I hitchhiked across the country. Between the age of 17 and 24, I made four such trips across the States and Canada. In June of 1973 I caught a ride - just outside of Denver - with the notorious serial killer Ted Bundy. Its a true story best left for another day. I often think of him these days - when I'm being challenged by the Intimidators who harass and threaten me. It gives me strength to say "Ted's dead, but even after all I've been through, I'm still here."

When I was twenty-four, I moved to my current home to begin the Onamia chapter of my life. Of course, that's a thirty year long story. I came here alone and made a life for myself. Onamia became my home. I thought that what happened to me in Plymouth could never happen to me in Onamia. I thought I would be safe here. They say that "Lightning Doesn't Strike Twice."

But its Deja Vous All Over Again!
I feel so young...
I feel fourteen once more.